I'm up late at night, avoiding going to bed, because I plan to quit smoking tomorrow. Getting that last cigarette in and mourning the process of yet another attempt in giving up the filthy habit.
I've tried several times. A couple of attempts have been for several days..even weeks...but I always relapse and quickly return to my pack a day habit. It's really the one thing keeping me from my goal. Not diet. Not exercise. Smoking is the most damaging thing to my health and life hands down.
Plus, it's costing me a friggin fortune.
Tomorrow is going to suck. May as well suck it up and face it. Goodnight.
1 comment:
Quitting an addition is always tough, and you must not see it as failure, but a short relapse on the road to not smoking. One thing to remember, once a smoker always a smoker. I am a smoker who just happens to have not lit a cigarette for about 10 years, but I know that one pull on a cig will get me started.
My smoking was more habitual than real craving. I smoked at certain times or in certain situations - walking to the station, waiting for the train, and if I could break that pattern I would be half-way there. Moreover, I made it difficult for myself to buy cigarettes by choosing routes that didn't go by shops, or giving myself a 'virtual' star for not buying a pack when I could have bought one.
All us smokers who have stopped smoking, have all found their own way of doing and maintaining that - it's just that you have yet to find your path.
But I repeat, you are not a failure, nor have you failed because you have not yet given up on giving up! and for that I salute you and wish you well with you struggle.
It's tough out there, but you will find the answer. We may never have met, but I feel you are strong enough to fight the good fight and, in the end, prevail.
Good luck - Mark
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