Monday Cat Blogging

Pain

I love the above scene from Star Trek. In it, Captain Kirk tells that pain is not something to be avoided or that guilt can be casually erased from one's life....but I see many people spending a great deal of their own lives trying to do just that. Lord Byron wrote "The great art of life is the sensation, to feel that we exist, even in pain". However; most of us follow the advice of another great poet, Daffy Duck, who says "I hate pain, it hurts".

So we avoid it. Through drugs, religion, possessions, or just flat out denial we spend mighty effort to not feel...bad....uncomfortable....pain. Because it hurts.

But it makes us who we are. Of all the regrets I have in my life (and I've got a shitload of them) I can honestly say that I wouldn't want to do things differently. The road I traveled got me to this here and now and if I had turned right instead of left somewhere along the way, I would never have had many of the current joys in my life. My kids, my grandkids, my wife, my friends....gone if I had avoided some pain at some time or another.

To live a life in fear of pain....to me....seems the most intense, and unnecessary, type of all.

Monday Cat Blogging

To Sleep—Perchance to Dream

I'm an early riser. It's not that I have any particular problems with sleeping, it's just that I tend to have problems waking up. I'm not one of those people that can leap out of bed and be out the door to start their day within a half hour. I need lotsa time...and lotsa coffee....to get going in the morning.

I generally wake up around 5 a.m. every day. I use to get up at 4, but it tended to irritate my wife and I eventually discovered that I was suffering from the effects of chronic sleep deprivation. My Dad always told me that "early morning is the best time of the day" and I admit to enjoying the peace and calm of the pre-dawn hours. Sitting outside and listening to the world wake up is as good a Zen meditation as you can find.

I also take this time to reflect on my dreams during the night. Not as in trying to interpret them and psychoanalyze myself....I think that's a bunch of BS anyway...but to just replay them in my mind for my own amusement. I've always had very vivid and complex dreams. Even what could be called nightmares are highly entertaining.

Anyway...where I'm going with all this is that I feel sleeping and dreaming are crucial to good health. I would venture to say, even more important than exercise. We need sleep to cleanse and recharge our bodies. We need to dream for the same reason. Good health depends on a good night's sleep. Bad sleeping habits can cause bad health, which in turn hinders a good night's sleep causing further health problems.

Ay, there's the rub!

Dog Attack

I staggered out this morning to do my cardio jog/walk/limp in the park. It's not really a park, more like a trail, but it's pretty nice and I find it much more fun than plodding along on a treadmill inside a gym. As I was loping along the trail, I came up to a lady doing a power walk with a little rat-like dog wearing a sweater. The mutt tore into a run straight for me yapping a mile a minute. I stopped and stood still because I didn't want the little rodent to bite my ankles, and the lady must have thought I was frightened because she said "oh, don't worry, he doesn't bite".

I managed a weak smile. Then I looked down at the alleged dog and had an instant flash fantasy of picking the little snot up, drop kicking him over the oak trees, throwing up my arms yelling "touchdown", and dancing around the lady as she screamed in horror.

Then I really grinned.

She, of course, thought I was smiling at her precious pooch and instructed her dog to "say bye-bye to the nice man". The lady resumed her power walk while the dog lagged behind long enough to deposit a little bomb on the trail.

Made me think that I should act on my fantasies more often.

Devil in the Details

I had a co-worker who described a particularly hectic day at work last week as trying to tread water with a swarm of rats clinging on to you. A somewhat gruesome image, but it did describe for me the frequent feeling of being overwhelmed with details and slowly sinking in an ocean of demands, duties, and deadlines. One day passes to several that passes to weeks to months and the grand goals for fitness are always just out of reach...because you are being pulled under by details. How to do it? How to shake the minutia of daily living to develop a new way of living daily? That's a question I struggle with all the time.

I'm losing...dammit.

I get lots of advice from folks that do seem to have the time and energy to stick to healthy eating and consistent exercise. Actually, the advice is usually in the form of "just do it", which is about as helpful as telling an addict "just say no". Like an addict...I know what to do but changing the way one lives while continuing to live a particular way is a bit more difficult than those who give the advice may imagine. That is why most effective behavior modification attempts take place in isolation from a person's everyday life.

But I can't do that!

I have a job....a demanding one....one with responsibilities that I just can't walk away from or put on a back burner while I get my shit together with other stuff. My job requires my full attention. It requires a willingness to respond with no regard to the clock or the calender, whether I'm hungry or sick, sleepy, or dead tired.

Many people have that problem, especially those my age. We have responsibilities. Unlike some twenty-somethings..our lives are not entirely our own. Other people depend upon us. I'm searching for an answer, a secret, on how to change a lifestyle while living in a lifestyle. How to shake off a few of the rats.

Monday Cat Blogging

Monday Cat Blogging

Monday Cat Blogging

Monday Cat Blogging

day 3

day two

I'm A Little Tea-Pot

Short and stout. Here are my stats for today...sigh.

215 lbs. 40.5% body fat

neck - 16

bicep - 13

forearm - 11

chest - 46.5

stomach - 49.5

waist - 43

hip - 43.5

thigh - 22.5

calf - 15.5

Day one

Monday Cat Blogging

M

I'm back!

FitnessManswers Friday

Control

I'm 52. I wasn't suppose to get this old. Didn't plan on it. Didn't expect it. They say that young people believe that they are immortal; but really, the delusion is that one will always be young...in one's prime...always. Growing old is something that happens to other people. We don't prepare ourselves for a body going past 30, 40, past 50. Until, one day, there comes a realization while looking in the mirror of "my God! What the hell happened?"

Then the little breakdowns begin. Parts of the body hurt for no particular reason. Hair whitens and thins while other hair grows like weeds in other places. The belly expands and droops. Jowls appear. Wrinkles. On and on, yadda, yadda. Friends start developing illnesses. Diabetes. Heart disease. Stroke. The dreaded cancer. They start dying and, day by day, that sweet little delusion of it happening to other people starts to erode with every chest twinge and headache. A steady slide to body failure which seems to be beyond control.

Or is it?

Back in my youth there were many things out of control in my life. I was probably crazy. In fact, I'm sure of it. The craziness was most likely fueled by an abundance of drugs but the result was a vast destruction of many years along with the heartbreaks of anybody unfortunate to be close to me at the time. Yet, for some inexplicable reason, I grew tired of the chaos and made a decision to regain control of my life. I quit drugs. I got a job. I went to school and finished. I stopped blaming circumstance and took responsibility for my life.

It worked. I like myself. I like my life. I regained my self respect along with my sanity. It wasn't easy and it was not at all quick.

I think I can do the same with this body that I've walked around in for over half a century. Gain control. Choose the path I want. Change.

Change? Too late?

No. I refuse to accept that.

In a couple of weeks I turn 53. My goal, my path for the next year, is to make the changes on my body that I have made in my brain.

Finally fit by 54.

FitnessManswers - Friday

Monday Cat Blogging

FitnessManswers Friday - Eating Out

Going Out to Eat

Probably the best way to make sure that you are eating a healthy meal is to prepare it yourself and eat it at home. Still....in the real world....that's not always possible. You find yourself away from home. You decide you would like to have a bit of a social life and go out with friends. You want to go on a date. Whatever; there are times when eating at home is just not available and you will be visiting whatever fine dinning establishment you enjoy.

Nothing wrong with that...provided you remember a few key points:

1. Restaurants try to make their food as tasty as possible. This means adding flavor like salt, sugar, FATS, and all kinds of chemical enhancements. Keep in mind that, no matter what you eat, you will probably go way over your daily allotment of calories, sodium, and fat. That's why it's not a good idea to eat out very often.

2. Restaurants provide whopping sized portions. People instinctively like to eat at places where they feel they are getting their money's worth....whether it's actually a value or not. This is evident in fast food places where you can "supersize" an order for an extra buck to get a few pennies more of fries. Don't throw out the idea of portion control just because you're eating out, it's probably more important than ever. Ask for a doggie bag. One thing I often do is order from the senior menu; the choices are generally smaller with portions, which I suppose is based on the assumption that old people don't need as much food.

3. Drink water. Not having a big glass, or two, or three of fizzy sugar water can cut your calorie count for a meal in half. Give up soda pop...your pancreas will thank you.

All in all...it's good to go out and enjoy life and eating good food is one of life's biggest joys. Make it a treat though, instead of a lifestyle.

Monday Cat Blogging

Introspection

Sometimes...I like to just stop....sit....think about what it's all about. Here's what I pondered upon.

I started this blog over three years ago. At the time, I had passed my 50th birthday and was profoundly unhappy with the shape my body had taken over the last few years. I was very overweight and out of shape. I did not do any real activity. I ate all the wrong type of foods to excess. I smoked. I was a wreck. I felt sick all the time. I was dying...faster than I realized.

Since that time, though I've never reached the stated goal of this blog title through starting and stopping countless times, I've passed that uncomfortable point of awareness about my own health. I know I have to exercise. I know I have to watch what I eat. I know what the consequences are of not taking care of myself. I can't go back to that blissful ignorance and rationalization that I can always take care of things tomorrow.

Except...I will take care of things....tomorrow.

The body I want, the health I crave, the life I need....all start on Monday. Things will never be the same.

and neither will I

Monday Cat Blogging

Home Work

Home Work from Jay Sheer on Vimeo.

I went to the YMCA today and it was packed full of people. So I decided to go back home and do my upper body there instead.

Cat Blogging Monday

 

Yard Work

Yard Work from Jay Sheer on Vimeo.

What's more boring than watching grass grow? Why...watching somebody cut that grass.

Balloons

Balloons from Jay Sheer on Vimeo.

I don't care what anybody thinks...hot air balloons are cool.

FitnessManswers

Home Made Protein Bars

Before Photos

I finally got around to having the before photos I had taken developed into actual photographs. Having them on my computer is one thing but there is just something about having real, tangible, glossy prints that makes it all a bit more real.

And boy...was it ever a reality check.

I'm seriously considering taping one of these photos to my fridge and another on my exercise bench to remind myself why I am doing this in the first place.

Monday Cat Blogging

FitnessManswers

Second Step

I've just completed the second step of eighteen in the Transformation challenge. This assignment dealt with developing a balanced exercise routine...one that is reasonable and able to easily fit into my lifestyle on a weekly basis.

I'm doing aerobic exercises on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays for about 20 minutes each. I'll also be doing strength training with weights on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays for around 40 minutes each day.

Note....that is only three hours a week. It pretty much destroys any excuse about not having time to exercise.

Monday Cat Blogging

Day 6

It really doesn't matter what you do for cardio as long as you're moving.

Looking Forward

Yesterday, I wrote about what is going on with me now. It's part of the process of developing goals. I mean...you can't really think about where you want to go unless you have an idea of where you are starting. I see this in a lot of people (myself included) where goals are set without bothering to take stock of where one is at, why, and just how to get to the end result. Without knowing the starting point, most of us end up wandering around in a big circle time and time again...until we give up the goal altogether.

So, first I answered questions about where I am starting. Now I answer questions about where I want to end up in 18 weeks.

Heart and Soul

Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, three changes I will have made that show I’m more aligned with what’s important to me at a heart and soul level are:

Healthy living will be a natural part of my life.

I will have the energy to enjoy each day.

I will feel good about myself and be able to share that with those I love.

Emotions

Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, the three most predominant inner feelings which describe what I’ll be experiencing are:

Confident of having control over my body.

Excited about the improvements and eager to continue.

Inspired to encourage others to seek transformations.

Mindset

Three new patterns of thinking or beliefs which expand my ability to make healthy changes for the better will be:

My results will speak for my intent.

I will greet the day with enthusiasm.

I'll prove one is never too old or too out of shape to change.

Body

Three objectively verifiable statements which will describe the new and improved condition of my body 18 weeks from now are:

Within 18 weeks, I will be under 180 lbs.

My body fat percentage will be in the low twenties.

I will tuck my shirt into my pants.

Self-Assessment and Awareness

The Transformation Challenge is not your ordinary diet and exercise program. In just about every other program out there, the impression is 'follow the plan and you will get results'...eat these foods, don't eat those, do these exercises on these days and, voila, you'll have a ripped body in no time at all.

It's all about the outside. That's good to a point because, let's face it, everybody wants to look strong and healthy. Yet, if my experience and profession have taught me anything, it's that the way we think...the way we view ourselves and the world around...is at the core of everything we do or attempt. Transformation utilizes that principle in providing 18 assignments that are geared to really taking a look at oneself. The assignments are not easy (if one is honest in doing them). The first one, and my answers, are below.

Heart and Soul

Having looked inward to do some soul-searching, three heartfelt reasons for making the decision to transform my health and life are:

I'm tired all the time. I want to live my days instead of just letting the pass one at a time.

I want to set an example for my wife, so that we can both enjoy our lives for a long time.

I do not like the way I feel in my own body. It seems that I am always slightly sick.

Emotions

In recent days and weeks, the three most predominant inner feelings I have been experiencing are:

Fear about my physical condition and the potential for heart attack, stroke, and diabetes.

Ashamed of my condition.

Anger at myself for not doing anything to improve.

Mindset

Three patterns of thinking or beliefs which may have limited my ability to change in the past are:

I'm too old.

I'm too busy.

I'm too tired.

Body

Three objectively verifiable statements which reflect my physical condition right now are:

My weight, first thing in the morning, I've eaten, is 208 lbs.

My body fat is 42 %. My mid-section measurement at the widest point is 48 inches.

My present physical condition is evident in my before photo.

This is where I am now. Tomorrow, I'll answer the questions of where I want to be.

I Really Mean It This Time

Really. No foolin'. I don't know what happened the last time I tried to do the challenge. Well...yeah...I guess I do....I just gave up. It was too hard. I didn't have time. I'm too old so what's the point.

All excuses.

Oh, I wanted to transform. I talked about it. I wrote about it. The interesting thing though is that all that talking and writing didn't get me anywhere. Go figure.

Anyway; here I am again. The photos are taken. The first assignment is completed. I've two days under my looooong belt with a mantra in my head.....do it, do it, no excuses this time.

Thank You Mother Nature

There were three more pickup loads just like this, all sawed up nicely and taken over to the local forestry disposal site. Not the way I anticipated starting off my vacation, but I suppose it would have been worse to come home to broken trees all over my house.

Monday Cat Blogging

 

Transformer

No...not that kind....this

I've come to a conclusion about why my attempts at losing weight and getting fit seem to fizzle out all the time. It's mainly because I'm adding things, like diet and exercise, to my lifestyle...but not really changing all the stuff in my life which caused the need in the first place. To put it simply, what I have been doing isn't working because the way I live isn't working; at least as far as fitness is concerned. I can lose weight..sure. I can exercise...big deal. Nothing changes because nothing has changed.

What I'm getting at is that I need to transform how I live rather than just fiddle and tweak here and there. I need to alter pretty much everything I do around food. I need to clarify in my mind exactly why I want what I want and what I am willing to do....and...more importantly...what I am willing to no longer do.

And who knows....perhaps it's not too late to at last become a real transformer.

Pre-Transformation Musing

Testing

Turkey Burgers

It's what's for dinner. Ground white turkey meat. High in protein, hardly any fat, and very tasty when cooked on a grill with mesquite wood. The best thing....I have leftovers for a couple of lunches later in the week.

Before Photos

Doing it a bit differently.

Monday Cat Blogging

Monday Cat Blogging

Off Track

I come in contact with a lot of people at work. I have conversations with them, my shoulder gets cried on, I get yelled at, I shake hands, and I get a few unavoidable hugs. Some of these people don't practice the best hygiene and many of them shuffle around with all kinds of cold and flu germs. So...I get em. My immune system is actually quite strong but, once in a while, I catch a doozy of a bug and it just lays me out for a couple of weeks.

Oh, I keep going to work. To my mind, calling in sick means that you basically can't get out of bed. Plain old not feeling good is not a valid reason to me not to perform my duty. Yet not feeling good has been my norm for quite a few days now. Along with feeling pukey I've not been paying much attention to my diet. And exercise? Forget it.

Thus, for the last two weeks, I've gone off track with everything. Still lost some weight but it's probably due more to dehydration than fat going away. I'm not back up to feeling 100%. I may just have to chalk this down as a vacation from my fitness goal and regroup and restart later.

Breathe Easy

Driving around as I do on Saturdays when I'm at work. Mostly it's an easy, laid-back day. I go visit somebody there. Go check up on somebody at another place. Drive, drive, drive....listen to the radio....think about my upcoming days off....just truckin' like the Do-Dah Man with the window down and enjoying a nice spring day.

Whilst driving down one road this afternoon; however, I notice a whole bunch of fire trucks and police cars converge on an intersection and people proceed to run in several directions at once. I couldn't figure out what was going on until I drove right beside the tank that had fallen off the trailer in the photo above. It was full of anhydrous ammonia and the valve had evidently broken off.

I caught a lung full which felt like somebody had hit me in the chest with a baseball bat. Then I was unable to keep my eyes open. I floored my pickup and made a very sharp turn, fumbling to turn the air conditioning on full blast to clear out the air in my cab. The whole thing lasted no more than a few seconds but it seemed to be enough time for me to think to myself "If I don't get out of here now, I'm going to pass out and die" and "I hope I don't drive into another car or a house or some poor sap on the sidewalk".

I didn't die and I managed to keep from killing somebody else. It did get me thinking about what's important. I had all kinds of important things in my mind before I came alongside the broken tank. After all...I have an important job doing important stuff. I have a lot of important thoughts to think.

Except when I took a whiff of the ammonia. Then, like magic, the only thing I was able to focus on was getting my next breath.

Zen masters call it a moment of clarity.

Monday Cat Blogging

But...they do it on TeeVee

I watch the Biggest Loser, yes I do. Great drama. Inspirational. An all around entertaining show in which I look forward to watching each and every week. I really get amazed at the weight losses. Ten pounds or more a week. A contestant who loses only four or five is considered a slacker.

Then I look at my challenge and see that I've lost a total of 1.8 lbs since I started three weeks ago. One-point-eight! WTF?

Here's the difference. In the first place, those guys on the Biggest Loser are immense. Not overweight, not obese; freaking three, four, or more hundred pounds. I think one contestant this year was over 500 lbs. It's not muscle either, so doing any activity at all and cutting calories down to sane levels is bound to shed a lot of weight in a big hurry. Secondly, the contestants on that show work out, with trainers, a minimum of six hours every day. They have nothing else to do....no job, no family, basically no life.

So am I happy with my piddling loss so far?

Nope. But I'm considering that I'm probably losing the weight at about the same speed that I gained it in the first place. I also have one big advantage over any biggest loser....my pounds will stay gone.